Rosa McAllister (00:04):
(singing) Hi, everybody. This is Rosa McAllister, and it's 2 PM my time here in Hawaii, which means it's 8 PM in Pennsylvania, 8 PM Eastern Time, and it's the first Monday of the month. It's August 7th, 2023, and being the first Monday of the month and 8 PM Eastern Time that means that it's Healing Circle time. Here I am again. So for those of you who are regular listeners, or maybe those of you who are just stumbling upon us for the first time, we've been doing this series of Healing Circle Calls on the first Monday of the month at 8 PM for approximately 20-ish minutes. Um, kind of anonymously, you call in to this number, and whoever is here is here.

(01:07):
And one of us takes you on a little journey, something that we're thinking about, something that we wanted to share, some kind of a, whether it's a meditation or a thoughtfulness or a poem or a small exercise or a song or who knows what, something just thinking about, hmm, I think maybe others are thinking this too. And just the Healing Circle Calls the idea of just letting us know that we have each other's back, that we maybe are thinking similarly, that we, um, are there for one another and that we're not alone.

(01:45):
And that's how it kind of started many, many months ago with me and a couple of friends and then a couple more friends and a couple more friends. And then, we started doing this through networks for training and development, my organization that I lovingly work with. And we've been offering these Healing Circle Calls then first Monday of the month, 8 PM Eastern Time for, oh, I don't even know how many years now. And we've been recording them for about six years, I think.

(02:12):
So there is, if you go to networksfortraining.org, www.networksfortraining.org, um, you will find our online university. And in there, you will find our Healing Circle Calls. They're actually available on, uh, podcast, on most podcast streaming services. So please look us up and there's, as I said, about six years' worth of, um, recorded, if I can do math correctly, hmm, let's see, six times 12 is about 72 of these that are available and this one will be added in.

(02:48):
So thank you so much for joining us, whether you're a new, um, person in here with us for the first time, or whether you're someone that's regularly in here with us right here in Healing Circle Calls, or occasionally, or whether you're listening to us in a recording several months or maybe even years later, I'm honored to be the guest lead for our Healing Circle Call today.

(03:15):
And it's a little bit different what I'm gonna do today from what I usually do. I oftentimes try to keep it somewhat topical, connected to what's going on in the world. And this one is really connected to me and my world and a bit of a surprise to me. And that is the Barbie Movie. Yep, the Barbie Movie.

(03:39):
So if you're listening into this sometime later, you may or may not know the buzz, or if you're listening to this now and your, you've got your head in the sand or you live under a rock, you may not know about this. But there is out right now one of the big movies out right now is the Barbie Movie and I wasn't necessarily geared up to go to it. I didn't really necessarily think I would do it, but, uh, you know what?

(04:08):
When, and I usually don't get sucked into the hype and there is a lot of hype around the Barbie movie right now, but when you have two friends, two girlfriends that are visiting town and you have an 11-year-old granddaughter who's been buzzing about the movie and saw it on its opening day with one of her good friends and dressed up for it and the whole bit.

(04:32):
And then, two friends, two girlfriends who are in town, who are here doing some work, and probably the last two people you would think of who would be interested in going to see the Barbie movie, tell you that they're gonna go on Sunday, and you wanna go with them, and you say, "Yeah." It kind of jump, jumps out of your mouth. And then, you think maybe your granddaughter, your 11-year-old granddaughter would wanna come with you, and she's here right with me now nodding her head in the background.

(05:04):
And so, we decided we were gonna go on Sunday, and we had a couple days preparation, and I guess we needed it. So we got into the hype. We got into the whole thing. And with Olivia, my granddaughter's help, we put on pink eyeshadow, all of us, even my two friends, Glenna and Sandy, who barely wear makeup like I do. We all put on pink eyeshadow with Olivia's help, and we all wore pink, and I pulled out extra pink scarves and hair things and all that stuff. We put shiny lip gloss on, of course pink. And off we went as giddy girls to see the Barbie movie.

(05:48):
We got there just in time. And it was really something. It was really something. And I have since, just in less than 24 hours, been recommending it to lots of different people, including a bunch of guys. Because I think there's some pretty interesting lessons in the movie that really surprised me. I had read some reviews, trying not to read too much about it. But I did hear some, read some, and heard that there were some starting, startling messages, a little bit different than what I would have guessed coming from pinky Barbie. And I have to agree.

(06:30):
So, but first, let me take you down memory lane a little bit. So I am the ripe old age of 68. I was born in 1955, and Barbie came out in '59. And I don't remember exactly when or how, but I got one of the original Barbies for my own. And I remember being in awe of her and playing with her a lot. And I had Skipper, who was, I think, her niece and her friend, Midge. And I had Ken, one of the original Kens. And I had Ken's, uh, sports car. It wasn't Barbie's, it was Ken's. And Barbie's airplane, which I thought was amazing, it wasn't Ken's, it was Barbie's.

(07:13):
I didn't have the dream house, but I had a whole bunch of other fun things over the years. And I had lots and lots of outfits, some of which my mother made for me. And it's funny because my friend, Glenna, who went with me, said that she had to buy her own Barbie because she was brought up very Catholic and because the doll had boobs, her mom wouldn't buy it for her, so she had to buy it for herself.

(07:37):
Now my mom was the ultimate Catholic, wonderful, sweet mom, but for some reason she really liked Barbie. And in fact, when I got Barbie, I know my mom took her to her hairdresser to show her hairdresser and all the ladies, because this was the first realistic doll that there was, adult doll. Up until then, they were only baby dolls that we had, or toddlers, and then came along Barbie. She came out in 1959, as I mentioned. I must have gotten her sometime right after that. So I kind of grew up with Barbie and played with her, with my friends Carolyn and Marilyn Anne.

(08:18):
Um, I had the most Barbie and bought toys or clothes and apparatus of Barbie and all that. So we often played in my bedroom, all kinds of incredible make-believe games with Barbie. So that's kind of my history. And I will say that at 12 years old, when my niece Michelle was about to be born into my family, I suddenly got the idea that I was grown up. And so, I stupidly gave away Barbie and Skipper and Midge and Ken and the sports car and the airplane and all of the clothes and accessories that I had. I remember boxing them all up, which becomes a theme in the movie, too, by the way. And I gave them to Goodwill. And boy, do I wish I hadn't done that. Oh, my goodness. But that's a whole other story.

(09:07):
So anyway, what's this, what's all the buzz about this movie? Well, there's beautiful people in it, all kinds of stars, um, from the movie industry, from Hollywood. That surprised me. I didn't know. I knew that there was, um, you know, the, the two main characters, Barbie and Ken, I knew who they were, you know, I saw, I didn't see the trailers, but I saw some ads about them and stuff. But I didn't expect to find a lot of other well-known celebrities in the Barbie movie too.

(09:40):
And in the less than 24 hours since, and conversations that I've had with a couple of people about it, I found out that there was almost a waiting list of stars and celebrities who wanted in on this movie, not just because what it was about, about Barbie and Ken and Barbie Land, but the messages that were embedded in it. So some of that I wanna share with you. Some of the, what others are saying were some of the messages and then I'll go into some of my takeaways.

(10:16):
So, yeah, there's been big press about this, and big money. It's topping the, the movie market right now. And actually, I can understand why. And again, I don't usually go for the hype. I don't usually go for the biggest movies that are out right now, and in fact, sometimes it's a letdown when I see them. This one was not the case. It was kind of the opposite.

(10:38):
And again, for those of you that don't know me, I'm not like a girly, girly and pinky kind of girl. So this reaction of mine, and I even wanna talk about it today with you all, is kind of startling, and kind of really fun, and also kind of what the whole movie is about, the whole premise of the movie. So without giving away anything away, you know, Barbie lives in Barbie Land, and there's lots and lots of different Barbies because those of us who grew up with Barbies or had any kind of semblance of toys over the last 60 years, know that Barbie has done everything.

(11:19):
Barbie has had many careers, um, because early on, they didn't wanna portray just a pretty girl, which she was, with high-heeled feet and boobs and the whole bit. Um, but they gradually, over time, wanted to portray Barbie more and more that she's kind of this every woman and every person. So, and I will say, in the audience, there were, it was not a super packed show that we went to last evening, but I've heard from many that the audiences are all ages, all stages, all sizes, all colors, and yes, all genders.

(12:07):
Lots of stories of dads and granddads dressing in pink along with their girls and going to see it. Lots of stories about middle-aged women and women, you know, Gloria Steinem kind of, uh, radical women going in big clusters to see this.

(12:27):
Um, and the lessons. So according to the web, and according to several articles that I've been reading, some of the basic lessons, some of which can be a surprise and some which shouldn't be a surprise are, number one, that girls can do anything. And it's Okay if you find that absolutely exhausting. You know, I started to mention that Barbie, over the years, has done many things, many careers, has had all kinds of outfits, um, has all kinds of different looks, different hair color, different skin color, different, not a whole lot of different size body wise, but there's been some of that.

(13:11):
But this idea that she can do anything, and throughout the movie you find out that while she's bubbly and kind and sweet and everything is going right, she also gets really exhausted, just like most of us who try to be the best that we are. Um, there's many talented Barbies in Barbie Land, and there, there are many, many Barbies, you know, Barbie president, Barbie physicist, Barbie veterinarian, Barbie this, Barbie that. The main star is, you know, kind of your general beginning Barbie, if you will. Um, and she does not have any kind of angst or competition against any of the other Barbies, because they all have different roles, and they all honor and respect one another, and support one another, especially when they find that maybe they are getting exhausted.

(14:11):
Um, something else that one of the lessons that others are talking about from the Barbie movie is that different generations of feminists can really find common ground with Barbie. Real women, real women of all different sizes and shapes and colors and generations are depicted in Barbie. And interestingly enough, a lot of them are represented in the of- in the, um, audiences that are going to see the movie.

(14:44):
Um, in there, in the movie, there's a mom and a daughter that, um, get very intimately involved with the movie and the story line. The daughter is going through teenage stuff, teenage angst, and she and her mom are going through mom and daughter teenage angst. And yet the connection still is Barbie. And the connection still is them finding their own way and who they really are.

(15:11):
And one of the best parts that I thought of Barbie, of the movie, was we get to meet Ruth Handler, who was the creator, the actual creator of Barbie at Mattel. And we get to meet her, or as she's depicted in the movie, and what she, the goals she had for Barbie, not just to be beautiful and not just to be this, but to really inspire women for generations. In spite of the original shortcomings of the design of Barbie, which was not hers, her idea was not that Barbie would have high-heeled feet and boobs and no waist and just a little puffy butt. That was not the idea of her.

(15:54):
Ruth Handler wanted to create an actual woman doll, a Barbie doll, and it was named after her daughter, Barbara, because she wanted her daughter to grow up believing she could be anything and do anything. And that's how she originally created Barbie. And in all honesty, through Mattel, they kind of changed some of that and created Barbie as a star, Barbie as a beauty, Barbie with curves and boobs and high-heeled feet.

(16:27):
Another message, very strong message in the movie was that extremes of masculinity and femininity are damaging to everyone. Ken in the movie is kind of, I wouldn't say he's emasculated, but he is not very sure of himself in a lot of ways, until he goes to the real world, follows Barbie to the real world, and then he sees, hah, America today, Los Angeles, kind of in a patriarchal society. And he gets this idea that things have been wrong in Barbie Land, and that they don't have to be ruled by women, and women don't have to be in the lead, and the men, the Kens don't have to follow the Barbies. Instead, they can take on a more masculine role and, in fact, start changing everything and taking control.

(17:20):
And as they do that, Barbie Land kind of changes because it's an extreme of masculinity that takes over. And previously, the extreme of femininity wasn't good either, because it emasculated the Kens. Another lesson from the movie that others are talking about is it's not women's burden to fix men who do not know yet who they are. Um, it's about, um, you know, we don't have to fix all the Kens, we don't have to do anything. They have to do. But we have to give them opportunity. And we have to give them kind of a window to find themselves. But that's our help, you know, instead of maintaining the illusion of a romantic relationship between Barbie and Ken, in this movie, that's not the case. They're just friends. They're just friends.

(18:22):
And as Ken sees a new role for himself, and takes it to a ridiculous extreme, Barbie helps to rebalance things where Ken can have a masculine role and she can have a feminine role and they can share things together. Another lesson is that womanhood is a constant balance of contradictions and recognizing that it is empowering and that we're always changing and, you know, there were parts of it, of the movie where I actually got teary-eyed and n- and not because there was an existential crisis or anything, although there kind of was, but because of the double standards that they showed in extremes, but was really representative of truth, of women, like myself and like Barbie, who have tried to do so much and be so much to control and take power.

(19:22):
Well, that's not necessary. We don't have to crush the patriarchy. That's not what we have to do. Another lesson is we need more female directors in Hollywood, and that is for sure. This was an all-women crew that put together the Barbie movie, and it's no surprise the way it came out, and I'll just leave it at that.

(19:48):
You know, so that's just some of what others are saying, and others are flocking to this. And as we kind of grow close to our time together here, just a couple of my takeaways are, um, first of all, go see it. If you're a woman, if you're a man, if you're a child, if you have an 11-year-old granddaughter. Oh, for heaven's sake, wear pink eyeshadow, pink gloss, um, and go have a great time, um, and go with some friends, or go by yourself.

(20:24):
And don't be embarrassed if you're 68 years old like me, or a guy, or don't have somebody to go with. Don't be embarrassed. Just go and see it. And go see it in the theater. Go add to the numbers of those who have seen it. And let me know what you think. Some of my all-time favorite takeaways from this movie that I hope my granddaughter always, always knows is that we can be anything we wish to be. It sometimes takes a lot of work and a lot of opportunity and seizing opportunities that come our way and making opportunities happen and creating things, creating opportunities. But we can be anything and we need to believe in ourselves that even if we're not five foot two, eyes are blue, long blonde hair, curvaceous, whatever, whatever.

(21:19):
There's weird Barbie, who kind of saves the day. And there's President Barbie, who falls astray for a while and becomes very subservient to some of the Kens, but refines herself. And there's all kinds of other Barbies, just like there's all kinds of us. Believe in you. You're amazing. And you make the world go around, and you make the world a better place. Just like all the Barbies and all the Kens and Alan, I must say, I remember Alan, they make Barbie Land really something.

(21:55):
And Ruth, the creator, she created something that really has lasted and stood the test of time through some pretty wild times and changes in our world. Barbie's still, she's still there. She still rocks. We all have talents. We all have abilities. We all have beauty. We all have strength. And we're amazing. And so is Barbie.

(22:22):
So, a little bit different of a Healing Circle Call, but go see Barbie. I wish I hadn't given away my toys, because if I had my Barbies right now, man, they'd be coming out and getting all dressed up and wearing all kinds of funky outfits and we'd be playing.

(22:41):
I hope you have a great day. Thanks for listening in. Stay tuned next Monday, first Monday of the month and every first Monday of the month at 8 PM Eastern Time for Healing Circle Call. We have lots of new guest leads and speakers for us for this new year that we just started. July 1st is our new year, and looking forward to all our Healing Circle Calls. So join me, but first go see Barbie. Thanks so much. (singing)