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(relaxing music)

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(singer vocalizing)

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- [Rosa] Hello everyone and aloha.

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This is Rosa McAllister

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from Networks for
Training and Development.

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And I'm here as your leader today

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of the Healing Circle call

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that we do the first Monday

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of every month at 8:00 p.m. eastern time.

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I am thrilled to be your leader,

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your social director,
your tour guide today.

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We have been doing this
for many, many years

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and have been recording these for,

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I don't know, six, seven
years, something like that.

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And you can find them on our website

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at NetworksForTraining.org.

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(Rosa laughs)

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So these Healing Circle calls
started many, many moons ago

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between me and many friends,

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several friends from all
different parts of the world

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who were all going through
something or other at the time,

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and just realizing that we needed

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to take a little bit of a break.

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We needed to help one another out.

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We needed to

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remember that we weren't alone

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in whatever was going on for us.

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And so we started doing
these once a month calls

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and we would each take a turn

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and lead a meditation
or a song, or a thought,

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or a inspiration or something.

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And then many years later,

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I suggested that maybe we could
do this as part of Networks

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and part of our holistic
practices work that we do.

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And so we've been doing it ever since.

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And we have guest
speakers, guest meditators,

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guest leaders for the year.

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And this just happens to be my turn.

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So today is Monday, September 2nd.

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Welcome to September.

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Welcome to...

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almost fall?

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I don't know.

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Where I am it's a pretty warm day today.

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It's not feeling like fall at all.

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It's certainly still
feeling like midsummer.

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It's also Labor Day today.

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Now, I don't know about you,

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but that brings all
kinds of memories for me.

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And probably for lots of us

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who grew up in the United States,

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Labor Day is kind of the
marker of the end of summer

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and the beginning of back
to school and back to work,

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and back to seriousness
and stop the vacations,

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and stop the play and stop the this,

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and start dressing more appropriately

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and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

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Or at least that's somewhat of my memory

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of Labor Day and what this means.

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So I'm glad to be with you today

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remembering and thinking back.

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And as I was preparing for
this Healing Circle call today,

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I couldn't help but remember back.

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So here's some of my memories.

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I want you to think along for yourself.

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Maybe it was a long think ago.

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Maybe it's just a short think back.

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But remembering summer days

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and Labor Days,

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and/or if you're not
from the United States

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or don't celebrate Labor Day,

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maybe it's just the end of summer.

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And if you're in the Southern Hemisphere,

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of course this is the end of fall

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and going into winter, I think,

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or is it the end of
winter, going into spring?

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Sorry about that.

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So whatever it is, it's
a time of transition.

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But here's some of my
memories of this time of year.

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I remember remembering back,

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especially on a warm summer day like this.

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I lived in an old stone house

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and my bedroom was on the second floor

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in the back of the house,
and I had two windows.

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One overlooked the
driveway between my house

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and my best friend Carolyn's house,

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and we actually did have a Dixie Cup phone

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that stretched across the
driveway from my bedroom to hers,

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which her father helped us establish.

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And to this day, we both swear

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that it worked perfectly.

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My other bedroom window
looked out over our backyard,

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over our shed,

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which was attached to
the back of our house

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in our long backyard.

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We had a very, very large old tree.

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I think it was an oak, but
I'm not sure in my backyard.

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And it provided the most
wonderful shade in the summer

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to what would otherwise have
been a boiling hot backyard.

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I grew up in the Philadelphia area.

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And Philadelphia area
was known for being hazy,

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hot and humid in summer,

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the triple H weather we called it.

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Where things were I mean, so still,

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you could hear the cicadas,
you could hear crickets.

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And it was just that buzzing heat,

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probably about a hundred
percent humidity or thereabout.

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As a little girl, I remember
I loved my summer pajamas.

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Now that might be a funny
thing to hear or say,

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but I absolutely adored my summer pajamas.

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And part of the reason was
because they were light cotton

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and had like little pink flowers.

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I had a couple pairs of them.

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They were shorts and a long shirt.

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And what I loved most about
my summer pajamas were

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that they were mine and not hand-me-downs.

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Because as the youngest of six kids

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and one of the youngest
of all the cousins,

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I got hand-me-downs left and right.

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And it wasn't often that I had something

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that would be just totally mine,

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but my summer pajamas were.

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And I would bring them
out with such anticipation

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early, early in the summer.

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And I would pack them away
with such regret in the fall.

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But I remember these summer pajamas

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and I remember also trying

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to get cool in our old
stone house at nighttime.

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And I would reverse my bed.

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That is, I would put my pillows
down at the foot of my bed

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so that it was just opposite the window.

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And any tiny little
breeze that would come in,

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I could feel it or I
pretended to at least.

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I would sleep on top of the covers,

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my summer quilt,

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and sleep down there.

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As I always said, I slept upside down.

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I remember it so distinctly.

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And I remember looking
out the back window,

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falling asleep,

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and hearing my older brothers or sisters

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or parents out in the
backyard and neighbors.

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Because at that time people
would just go outside

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and it was too hot to be inside.

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In fact, I remember my brother
sleeping on our front porch.

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And I remember neighbors
sleeping out in their backyards.

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And then as the summer wore on

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and came to this time of year,

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the closing down,

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I remember going shopping for my uniform

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because I went to Catholic school.

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And then I would oftentimes
have to get a new uniform

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because I was very tall and
very thin and kept growing,

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or the blouses or new shoes,

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or all the new things that
we would get for school.

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We were not a rich family,

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so I did not get a whole lot of outfits.

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And again, we wore uniforms,

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so there wasn't a need for school clothes.

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But I remember getting new pencils

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and sharpening them carefully,

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and having a new pencil pouch

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where I would lay them
all in in perfect order.

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I remember I would get a new notebook,

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one of those composition books

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and writing my name on the outside.

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In fact, I would oftentimes
get several of them

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or later I would get a
binder with the dividers.

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And I loved setting all of that up.

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Having a new book bag

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or oftentimes a hand-me-down book bag.

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It wasn't a backpack as we use now.

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New lunchbox, things like that.

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I remember just the joy
of getting these things.

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Am I bringing any of the rest

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of you back into your memories?

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I hope so.

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I was also a kid who
went to dancing school.

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So oftentimes we would
not have dancing lessons

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during the summer.

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So this time of year
also meant getting ready

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to go back to dance,

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which would mean a trip down
to Center City Philadelphia

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to Baum's ballet shop, B-A-U-M-S, Baum's,

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to get new ballet slippers

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or later, toe slippers or cap shoes.

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Because again, I was very
tall and I kept growing,

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so I kept outgrowing things.

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I remember getting a new leotard.

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And one year I was able
to finally get a pink one,

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because up until that I had
been too small, too skinny,

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and I could only have a black one.

00:09:06,803 --> 00:09:10,073
But I remember, I think
I was about 11 or 12,

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when finally they had
one in the blush pink

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that I could get with matching tights.

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And I was thrilled beyond belief

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and could not wait until
dance classes started again.

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So many memories, so many memories.

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How about you?

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How about you?

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This idea of getting ready,

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getting prepared,

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the excitement and anticipation,

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as well as the nervousness.

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I was a pretty shy kid.

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Again, I was very tall and very thin.

00:09:50,963 --> 00:09:52,613
For a long time, I had braces

00:09:52,613 --> 00:09:55,583
both on my legs and on my teeth.

00:09:55,583 --> 00:09:59,933
And I was not always thrilled

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about the idea of new
people or starting again,

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but there was always that
excitement and that hope.

00:10:08,153 --> 00:10:11,183
I also used to write a lot,

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poems and a journal,

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and I still have them.

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And looking back on them,

00:10:16,313 --> 00:10:20,183
not long ago in an old box I uncovered,

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I read about these anticipating
days of starting school,

00:10:24,803 --> 00:10:26,273
starting back,

00:10:26,273 --> 00:10:28,703
starting dance classes again,

00:10:28,703 --> 00:10:34,282
hoping for friendship,
hoping for good things.

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School was pretty easy for me,

00:10:36,653 --> 00:10:40,662
but it was the social
stuff that wasn't so easy.

00:10:40,663 --> 00:10:42,623
So reading about that

00:10:42,623 --> 00:10:46,223
and jettisoning back into little Rosa.

00:10:46,223 --> 00:10:49,373
Rosa Bott was my name then.

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I can actually see myself.

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Can you see yourself then?

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So as I've been blabbering on,

00:10:57,713 --> 00:10:59,603
what about you?

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Has it made you rethink about yourself

00:11:02,933 --> 00:11:08,753
at maybe seven, or eight, or 10?

00:11:08,753 --> 00:11:11,363
Or maybe even 15?

00:11:11,363 --> 00:11:14,153
This time of year brings so many memories.

00:11:14,153 --> 00:11:18,053
For many people, there
was a barbecue, a cookout,

00:11:18,053 --> 00:11:23,003
or a trip to the shore or
the beach one last time.

00:11:23,003 --> 00:11:26,933
In my family, it wasn't so much that.

00:11:26,933 --> 00:11:29,213
With six kids and busyness,

00:11:29,213 --> 00:11:31,883
it was more about just
all of us getting ready

00:11:31,883 --> 00:11:33,623
for school the next day,

00:11:33,623 --> 00:11:37,553
because we always started
back the day after Labor Day.

00:11:37,553 --> 00:11:40,643
What about you?

00:11:40,643 --> 00:11:43,133
What are the memories
that pop into your head?

00:11:43,133 --> 00:11:47,782
What are the things that you think about?

00:11:47,783 --> 00:11:50,813
Who was the you

00:11:50,813 --> 00:11:52,253
from those days?

00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:55,073
What did you look like?

00:11:55,073 --> 00:11:56,153
For many of us,

00:11:56,153 --> 00:11:58,613
we can remember the school pictures

00:11:58,613 --> 00:12:01,013
or remember certain events,

00:12:01,013 --> 00:12:05,363
but I want you to pull
up inside your brain

00:12:05,363 --> 00:12:09,383
a memory of you in this time of year.

00:12:09,383 --> 00:12:12,053
Maybe you too slept
upside down in your bed

00:12:12,053 --> 00:12:15,893
or had wonderful summer pajamas.

00:12:15,893 --> 00:12:18,292
Maybe you were more the
type that couldn't wait

00:12:18,293 --> 00:12:20,510
for the sweaters and the socks to come out

00:12:20,510 --> 00:12:26,213
and the warm clothes.

00:12:26,213 --> 00:12:31,283
Where were you? Who were you?

00:12:31,283 --> 00:12:33,083
Let's take a thought about that.

00:12:33,083 --> 00:12:34,523
For many of us,

00:12:34,523 --> 00:12:39,113
these are wonderfully
sweet, poignant memories,

00:12:39,113 --> 00:12:43,343
remembering ourself at
those ages and stages.

00:12:43,343 --> 00:12:46,133
But like myself, there's also tinges

00:12:46,133 --> 00:12:48,023
of nervousness and anxiousness.

00:12:48,023 --> 00:12:52,493
And for some of us, it might
be way more than a tinge.

00:12:52,493 --> 00:12:53,933
But whatever it is for you,

00:12:53,933 --> 00:12:57,533
I want you to pull up in your brain

00:12:57,533 --> 00:13:00,623
one specific memory of yourself.

00:13:00,623 --> 00:13:04,676
Try to get an image of you in your head

00:13:04,676 --> 00:13:07,793
from this time period,

00:13:07,793 --> 00:13:10,433
this time period, end of summer,

00:13:10,433 --> 00:13:16,193
beginning of September,
going back to school.

00:13:16,193 --> 00:13:20,548
Get an image of yourself
from one particular time.

00:13:20,548 --> 00:13:24,773
And I want you to breathe in deeply

00:13:24,773 --> 00:13:27,863
as you're remembering you.

00:13:27,863 --> 00:13:35,963
Breathe in and feel the feelings
of yourself in that time.

00:13:35,963 --> 00:13:42,923
Gradually try to lengthen
your inhale and your exhale,

00:13:42,923 --> 00:13:46,913
finding a slow rhythm

00:13:46,913 --> 00:13:49,313
that works for you

00:13:49,313 --> 00:13:54,623
as you're remembering yourself.

00:13:54,623 --> 00:13:58,283
Now, bring to mind,

00:13:58,283 --> 00:14:01,823
joyful you at that time.

00:14:01,823 --> 00:14:03,803
In the midst of everything else,

00:14:03,803 --> 00:14:05,903
I'm sure there's a little nugget,

00:14:05,903 --> 00:14:10,553
a little something about
joyfulness in your time,

00:14:10,553 --> 00:14:16,373
in this time of you being young,

00:14:16,373 --> 00:14:18,773
end of summer,

00:14:18,773 --> 00:14:22,643
restarting school or beginning school.

00:14:22,643 --> 00:14:25,703
What was the joy about?

00:14:25,703 --> 00:14:27,923
How did you show it, how did you feel it?

00:14:27,923 --> 00:14:32,723
What caused it?

00:14:32,723 --> 00:14:35,003
For me, it was those summer pajamas

00:14:35,003 --> 00:14:36,853
and laying upside down in the bed.

00:14:36,853 --> 00:14:41,783
It was the new pencil and
sharpening them just so carefully.

00:14:41,783 --> 00:14:44,993
And the new pencil pouch or case.

00:14:44,993 --> 00:14:48,743
Of getting my notebooks ready.

00:14:48,743 --> 00:14:53,843
Getting my uniform and the
school blouses and new socks,

00:14:53,843 --> 00:14:56,813
new dancing shoes.

00:14:56,813 --> 00:15:02,102
Oh my goodness, the joy of
that blush pink leotard.

00:15:02,102 --> 00:15:03,773
(Rosa laughs)

00:15:03,773 --> 00:15:07,793
What about you?

00:15:07,793 --> 00:15:13,313
Now, I want you to jump
forward into you of today,

00:15:13,313 --> 00:15:15,383
on this September 2nd,

00:15:15,383 --> 00:15:20,633
or whenever it is you might be
listening to this recording.

00:15:20,633 --> 00:15:22,463
Who are you now?

00:15:22,463 --> 00:15:25,883
What do you look like if you
could juxtapose a picture

00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:29,363
of you today next to
that other little imp,

00:15:29,363 --> 00:15:34,913
that other little you from years ago?

00:15:34,913 --> 00:15:38,993
And what brings you joy now?

00:15:38,993 --> 00:15:40,913
Is it the same kind of joy,

00:15:40,913 --> 00:15:44,813
the same simpleness as mine were?

00:15:44,813 --> 00:15:47,693
Is it more complex now?

00:15:47,693 --> 00:15:52,463
But what brings you joy now?

00:15:52,463 --> 00:15:56,813
And in fact, thinking about
the past couple of months,

00:15:56,813 --> 00:15:58,403
if you're in the Northern Hemisphere,

00:15:58,403 --> 00:16:01,283
your summer, that's just coming to an end.

00:16:01,283 --> 00:16:02,573
If you're in the Southern Hemisphere,

00:16:02,573 --> 00:16:06,143
your winter, that's just coming to an end.

00:16:06,143 --> 00:16:11,603
What was/what were the joyful moments

00:16:11,603 --> 00:16:16,103
in the last couple of months?

00:16:16,103 --> 00:16:20,843
Some of mine were planting
potatoes at our new home

00:16:20,843 --> 00:16:24,053
and having them grow incredibly

00:16:24,053 --> 00:16:28,163
within just three months.

00:16:28,163 --> 00:16:31,238
It was the joy of my two little kittens

00:16:31,238 --> 00:16:33,316
who are now a year old,

00:16:33,316 --> 00:16:35,663
who are in absolute heaven.

00:16:35,663 --> 00:16:38,153
And talk about feelings of joy,

00:16:38,153 --> 00:16:41,753
that's them here on
this macadamia nut farm

00:16:41,753 --> 00:16:43,673
where there's critters of all kinds

00:16:43,673 --> 00:16:46,733
and things that fall from
the trees and startle them

00:16:46,733 --> 00:16:52,013
and trees to climb and joy.

00:16:52,013 --> 00:16:56,363
Some of the music that I've gone out to,

00:16:56,363 --> 00:17:00,053
some of the friends that I've been with.

00:17:00,053 --> 00:17:02,813
Being in the ocean.

00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:05,453
They're all parts of my joy

00:17:05,453 --> 00:17:07,553
and have been in the
last couple of months.

00:17:07,553 --> 00:17:11,303
What about you?

00:17:11,303 --> 00:17:13,342
And if along the way you felt

00:17:13,343 --> 00:17:17,423
that maybe you've lost
that sense of connection.

00:17:17,423 --> 00:17:19,793
You've lost that joy.

00:17:19,793 --> 00:17:24,053
Maybe you just don't
feel that joy anymore.

00:17:24,053 --> 00:17:26,483
I understand.

00:17:26,483 --> 00:17:28,913
We go through ebbs and phases

00:17:28,913 --> 00:17:31,342
and waves in this life.

00:17:31,343 --> 00:17:33,413
And not all of them are joyful.

00:17:33,413 --> 00:17:35,003
And not all of them have fun.

00:17:35,003 --> 00:17:36,683
Just like my childhood

00:17:36,683 --> 00:17:42,683
certainly wasn't always joyful and fun.

00:17:42,683 --> 00:17:46,313
But sometimes if we can
remember even the beginning

00:17:46,313 --> 00:17:49,253
of an essence of joy

00:17:49,253 --> 00:17:55,077
or a laughter that came unexpectedly,

00:17:55,077 --> 00:17:59,602
or a food that was so good,
you just couldn't help

00:17:59,603 --> 00:18:02,603
but being loud about how good it was

00:18:02,603 --> 00:18:06,563
while it was in your mouth.

00:18:06,563 --> 00:18:08,783
Or a picture.

00:18:08,783 --> 00:18:10,763
Or a friend.

00:18:10,763 --> 00:18:13,013
Or a grandchild.

00:18:13,013 --> 00:18:15,863
Or a kitten.

00:18:15,863 --> 00:18:19,193
Something that even in
the worst of our times,

00:18:19,193 --> 00:18:22,102
there's still little sparks.

00:18:22,103 --> 00:18:23,993
And maybe it's not total joy,

00:18:23,993 --> 00:18:27,383
but they're little sparks that happen.

00:18:27,383 --> 00:18:30,323
Maybe focus on one or two of those

00:18:30,323 --> 00:18:35,003
that have happened recently.

00:18:35,003 --> 00:18:39,592
And then I want you to do one last thing

00:18:39,593 --> 00:18:42,413
with me tonight,

00:18:42,413 --> 00:18:46,763
and I want you to think about somebody

00:18:46,763 --> 00:18:55,973
or something that you helped
to make joyful recently.

00:18:55,973 --> 00:18:58,223
Because we all do it.

00:18:58,223 --> 00:19:03,293
Even when we don't plan to,
even when we don't mean to,

00:19:03,293 --> 00:19:06,623
we provide and give joy

00:19:06,623 --> 00:19:09,893
in some of the most wonderful, small,

00:19:09,893 --> 00:19:13,433
what seem to be insignificant ways.

00:19:13,433 --> 00:19:17,169
But they're not, are they?

00:19:17,169 --> 00:19:18,923
And I don't know about you,

00:19:18,923 --> 00:19:23,633
but for me, when I've been
in the deepest of darks,

00:19:23,633 --> 00:19:25,913
the darkest of the deeps,

00:19:25,913 --> 00:19:28,043
those times when I wasn't sure

00:19:28,043 --> 00:19:32,393
if I would ever smile or laugh again,

00:19:32,393 --> 00:19:37,313
knowing or being told or being reminded,

00:19:37,313 --> 00:19:41,723
or seeing that I caused some joy

00:19:41,723 --> 00:19:47,993
or at least helped someone
feel a little bit better,

00:19:47,993 --> 00:19:53,063
that has turned me around.

00:19:53,063 --> 00:19:56,842
So it's easy to talk
about, "Oh, be more joyful.

00:19:56,843 --> 00:19:57,923
Oh, have more fun.

00:19:57,923 --> 00:19:59,993
Get on with it, blah, blah, blah."

00:19:59,993 --> 00:20:03,653
And it's not always so easy to do.

00:20:03,653 --> 00:20:06,203
But again, even in the deepest,

00:20:06,203 --> 00:20:08,813
in the darkest of times,

00:20:08,813 --> 00:20:14,753
I bet we all provide a
little something to somebody.

00:20:14,753 --> 00:20:17,783
And if we could focus on that

00:20:17,783 --> 00:20:20,663
and know that we have helped someone else,

00:20:20,663 --> 00:20:23,933
maybe it'll spark a
little bit more of a smile

00:20:23,933 --> 00:20:26,303
or a spring in our step,

00:20:26,303 --> 00:20:30,563
or at least a little bit less anxious

00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:32,513
or less bad

00:20:32,513 --> 00:20:36,953
or less nervous about ourselves.

00:20:36,953 --> 00:20:42,113
So from this little girl
who's not so little anymore,

00:20:42,113 --> 00:20:44,963
now living an amazing and wonderful

00:20:44,963 --> 00:20:48,653
and sometimes hard life.

00:20:48,653 --> 00:20:51,653
Who once was that little
girl who slept upside down

00:20:51,653 --> 00:20:55,582
on the hot summer nights in
my favorite summer pajamas,

00:20:55,583 --> 00:20:57,221
listening to my family

00:20:57,221 --> 00:21:00,143
and my neighbors and my neighborhood.

00:21:00,143 --> 00:21:04,193
And knowing that even
though things were hard,

00:21:04,193 --> 00:21:08,693
I was okay, and I slept well.

00:21:08,693 --> 00:21:10,943
So from me to you,

00:21:10,943 --> 00:21:13,703
I hope you have memories

00:21:13,703 --> 00:21:17,092
that are at least somewhat joyful,

00:21:17,093 --> 00:21:21,293
if not over the top joyful.

00:21:21,293 --> 00:21:25,493
I hope this September that we now are in

00:21:25,493 --> 00:21:29,153
is one of your absolute best.

00:21:29,153 --> 00:21:32,602
And I hope the joy that
you give others comes

00:21:32,603 --> 00:21:37,013
back to you a hundredfold and then some.

00:21:37,013 --> 00:21:38,723
Thanks for joining in.

00:21:38,723 --> 00:21:43,403
Thanks for joining with
me down memory lane.

00:21:43,403 --> 00:21:46,793
Thanks for joining Networks'
Healing Circle call.

00:21:46,793 --> 00:21:49,013
Come back and join us
again the first Monday

00:21:49,013 --> 00:21:51,352
of every month at 8:00 p.m. eastern time.

00:21:51,353 --> 00:21:55,043
Same channel, same Zoom
station we're now using.

00:21:55,043 --> 00:21:59,033
And look on our website,
NetworksForTraining.org,

00:21:59,033 --> 00:22:01,973
and look for our recordings
of Healing Circle calls.

00:22:01,973 --> 00:22:05,453
They go back many years.

00:22:05,453 --> 00:22:06,286
Thanks.

00:22:06,286 --> 00:22:09,067
(relaxing music)

00:22:09,067 --> 00:22:12,067
(singer vocalizing)